" I smile and act like nothing's wrong. I call it putting shit aside and being strong."


Life is being tough these days. I dont even know if im really being strong or faking it. With no one by my side who would listen and be there for me. I just need some attention. I need my space. I need my love ones. Why cant you people just give a little understanding ? They see me smile and laugh every single day but deep down i need you people. I need to share my things. Seriously, if i had a friend like TED of course i wont bother you people. I know everyone has a life to lead. But they need a friend to lean on right? Same goes to me. Im a normal girl just like you people.

The sky is getting rough. Im not able to handle this by myself but im trying. Im not an attention seeker but i need the love and comfort too. I just feel like leaving this disaster life or place maybe? I dont want to go school if i get cold shoulders. Going home and listen to parents babbling. Going out .. nahh thats it. Its been awhile since i smile widely and sincerely. I've been out alone every single day reflecting on what have i done. Yup, Challenges by Allah. I'll have to face it. But, its not fair. Im a girl who WANTS and NEEDS to be HAPPY.

I just wish that the sky will turn out to be brighter like before. Im sick and tired of losing my grip, wasting all the tears every night. Crying to bed. I want my happy life back Allah. Just give me this one chance and i'll promise i'll make a change to it. I used to be this quiet side of me and i've manage to make a change, and now you're testing me again. Im afraid if i will giveup one day and never get up again. Im afraid if my past haunt me and this time it will be by myself unlike previously. You send me the greatest gift.. Im sorry. I cant continue this.

"This feelin that we feel, tell me that its real, don't let love come just, to pass us by.
Try, is all we have to do, its up to me and you to make this special love, last forever more. "
♥